Body Image and Disordered Eating

For Bad Indians and South Asian Misfits who have ever been told:

• That you can exercise your way to being skinny

• That you’ll be happy once you’ve lost weight

• That you can “control” what you eat 

• That no one will want you because you’re fat or dark 

• That you should be ashamed about the way you look 

Who have ever: 

• Skipped or cut down meals 

• Ate the same food over and over 

• Ate too little or at too much 

• Avoided eating cultural dishes 

• Have anxiety around “bad” foods

• Felt guilty for having a cheat day or skipping the gym 

You are allowed to REST. You are allowed to HAVE SECONDS. You are allowed to sit out in the SUN You are allowed to TAKE UP SPACE. 

I wonder what it would be life if your body was the “ideal”? If you didn’t have to worry about going to the doctor because you already know what they’re going to say? If you didn’t have to anticipate the “You gained weight!” comments from your relatives when you visit home? Or if your weight and skin tone didn’t influence how “eligible” you are in this “competitive” dating “market”? 

Healing from diet culture isn’t easy, and your desire to lose weight and look like the “ideal” is valid. The medical industry, society, and our culture place thinness on a pedestal. Our culture also places light or fair skin on a pedestal too. It might look like these things come easier to other South Asians, which is true. There are South Asians who benefit from thin privilege and colorism, and many aren’t willing to admit that they do. This is related to our caste system. 

But more South Asian Americans struggle with this than you think.  It’s hard to tell who has an eating disorder and who doesn’t. According to a 2014 study in the UK, disordered eating patterns are prevalent among South Asians. Some studies suggest that South Asian women and girls in the Western world are actually more at risk than any other ethnic group of developing an eating disorder. Many of us aren’t super informed about how widespread disordered eating patterns are in our communities because of stigma. So very few of us talk about this. 

For Bad Indians and South Asian Misfits, body image goes hand-in-hand with skin color. We might think it’s more acceptable to be a darker-skinned South Asian so long as you’re thin. Or if you’re fat, “At least you’re not dark”. According to a 2023 study, 31% of South Asian Americans admitted to using skin-lightening products. In the dating market, being both light-skinned and thin puts you at an advantage and makes you a more attractive partner. 

Just like in any culture, it’s hard to talk about body image without someone mentioning that we can just “change” the way we look. Poof! Problem solved! Contrary to popular belief, losing weight and changing your skin tone is not that simple or easy. Many biological and hereditary factors prevent this from happening. And besides, even if it was easy, why should being thin and light be something we strive for? Why can’t we be fine just the way we are? 

If you struggle with your relationship with food and body, I want you to know that whatever decision you choose to make is completely valid. I’m not here to tell you what you should or shouldn’t want for your body. It’s OK if losing weight or lightening your skin is your goal.

It’s not about WHAT you’re striving for. It’s about your WHY. I see the pain, hurt, and trauma you’re experiencing. I’m here to help you explore why these goals are important to you, and what past experiences have informed your decision. In our work together, I might connect you with other supports who can help you, such as South Asian nutritionists, doctors, and coaches. I can be a guide, but your body belongs to you! Let’s work together to be kinder to your body. 

Are you a Bad Indian or South Asian Misfit struggling with body image? Schedule your free intro call today to see if we’re a good fit!