Within South Asian communities and beyond, Malala was expected to be the “good Muslim girl,” and the “good Pakistani girl.” She was meant to be brimming with courage, but also modest; outspoken, yet palatable to Eastern cultural norms. In the eyes of the West, she was expected to be committed to her roots, but overall digestible to global audiences, to be their idea of what a “good Brown woman” or a “good victim” should be. Ultimately, Malala represents the battle between the West’s desire to use women as a pawn for their gain, and the East’s battle for global respect and humanity. Her humanity is lost in the process. Her story is a rich case study for good girl conditioning.

For many South Asian Americans, there’s a quiet, persistent ache that comes with watching your immigrant parents struggle in a world they weren’t born into. You see their confusion at new systems, their exhaustion, their longing for familiarity—and you feel torn. And while there’s truth in their hardship, this narrative misses something vital: our parents are not helpless. They are incredibly resourceful people who survived what most of us can barely imagine.